Your L.o.v.e ???

OK, if i take a Poet, as the most romantic, the most passionate, n the most promising Lover, there could be...

Is there a Poet, who married for love n for the rest of his life, wrote all his poems n ghazals for his beloved wife ?

Can a Man really Stay in Love for that Long ?

...where one flame dies, another begins...Where does it go Wrong ?

Is Love just an esctatic Thought ? ...an excuse ?...an Escape ?

P.S. You say...for Love??? ...i'll buy it for faith, i'll buy it for honour, but not for this.

love ! n live !

"Whether it's another person or loving an activity or a piece
of art or nature, love is all about connecting."

_( Professor Marc Cohen, founding professor of complementary
medicine at RMIT University, said in his address to the International Conference
on Healthy Ageing and Longevity )

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travel notes

I had to be in Rawalpindi for the weekend, so last night was spent in a road trip. We usually avoid going through the motorway when the sun's up, because of its being so hot n deserted, but to avoid night traffic, we took it last night. The four hour journey turned out quite good.....speeding on a clear road, with a clear night sky outside, n music inside, it was nice. :) or I may say it was perfect. I wouldnt have mind it at all , if we had to spend the whole night like that. ;)

____________________

I had talked with him in the morning, so he was still on my mind. I had always been telling him, that it wasnt to be wished for. I had told him before...but he dint stop there...

wo rastey sab khamosh they jo

uss bund gali ko jatey they...

.....if only he had listened...I was a dead end.

May be it isnt anything new for him, n probably for me too.

Yess, for me, its another aazmaish...

yet another aazmaish.

And I have to go through this one too.

I dont know why it gets tougher n tougher each time. Each time, someone tries to break into my realm, each time I have to save my soul, each time I survive, then again, to find another ordeal waiting for me, round the next corner.

Im a woman, for God's sake!

...It isnt no steel. it melts.....

n they know, that it does!

_____________________

When will I get Home???

Unscratched, Untouched...Whole hearted...

Will it ever be Delivered???

.....as I spent the whole journey looking out through my window, into the deep blanket of the sky,

I wished...I could wrap it all round myself...

I wished...it could take me into its depths...

I wished...it could hold me tight...all night.

a night of blessings

Its the eve of 15th Shaban...Shab-e-Ber'aat.
According to Islamic beliefs, tonight the angels are issued annual orders related to our lives; of birth, death, n the subsistence for the year to come, (as already written in the Loh-e-Mehfooz). Also, whatever we did last year is filed in our accounts.
This process starts from tonight, that is shaban 15, and ends at shab-e-qadr, in ramadam. Its also a night of great blessing & salvation, like Qadr. Prayers are answered and all those who repent and seek forgiveness are forgiven, except for those who believe in others than one God, n hold contempt in thier hearts.
its like tonight God says:

hum tou mael-ba-karam hain koi saail hi nahin

raah dikhlaain kisey, rahro-e-manzil hi nahin

... its an open invitation...hope i dont miss it.

_____________________________________________________
shaban: the 8th lunar month, before ramadan, one of the holiest months in Islam.
Shab-e-Baraat: the night of acquittance.
also called laila-tul-mubarika ( the night of blessings)~ the most blessed night after laila-tul-qadr.
Loh-e-Mehfooz: the book of devine knowledge, of fate.

mirror

when i forget my self, i look in to a mirror, mirror of my soul !...i look in to Your Eyes.

Life gets a LIFE_ when we Relate, when we Belong

dull n bright, i could see all that. warmth n cold, i could feel all that. right n wrong, i could think all that. i had everything...i had a life.

but that was a secret...unsaid, unheard, untouched, unfelt.

_

it was'nt a big deal. Everyone around, more or less, could also see, could also feel, could also think. i wasnt Unique.

nor could my life make any difference in the world...like making it a better place to live, or whatever.

n so i thought: why unveil it? why share it?...or should i say why exhale it?...why exhale?

you know, i know, its not oxygen anyway.

so, i kept it to myself, unsaid, unheard, untouched, unfelt, untill.....

_

oneday, i exhaled.....spilled out the secret__the not-so-extraordinary, the not-so-substantial, n the quite-blah blah...that i had. adding one more voice to the noise, i spoke...broke the shell, n reached out.

_

they dint hear me n they dint stop. the crowd dint turn around to look at me. But, a Face did...

n as our eyes met; spirits Resonated.....for i Belonged.

Kevin Thom

i just came across this photographer, while searching for something else. the last image i posted; hands_compel was also one of his beautiful works. its concept was so sublime that i just fell in love with it instantly. i found his work quite inspiring. most of his images are like that, i.e., beyond photography.

.......

from a pragmatic person , ive turned in to a highly emotional being. this year transformed me completely. may be im sick. i never lost my focus like this before.

right now i feel lonely, i wanna talk endlessly, insanely, about nothing n everything...like a stupid chatter box. not that i dont do it at all, but its not enough, n there isnt really anybody else except my mother who approves of my childish endeavors, shes fun, but still i cant say all that rubbish to her, shes mom afterall. : n friends...hm they're all so grown ups, busy meeting deadlines, earning bucks , we hardly get the time now to get together n share our lives.

he's a friend too, but one thing about him always repelled me. i feel that he always trys to prove things, to himself, n to others, though modest on the outside, he does things for the sake of achievement. may be im taking it all wrong, but i ve never felt comfortable with him for that. may be its just my cynicism against name n fame.

when ever nana jee calls he asks me about just everything, including, the trick question, what type of a guy i want...then he'd tell me about the wonderful guys he woudve met, n everything else my mom had told him. im just as clueless as him. i havnt met anybody , whom i could spend the rest of my life with. to love is easy, but to bear it, is the toughest part. compatibility is a serious issue, when it comes to sharing life, practically.

You

Who are You ?... You're an inspiration, a thought, a heart....i need not know anything else about You. thats the only interest i have in You.
What do i get from You ?... no word, no deed, but Your intention...as long as it is there.
What do i give inreturn ?... nothing, but the same.
...thats how i relate to You.

P.S. i've said it before, loud n clear , when You thought it was just 'beautiful'. so i repeat. if You still have doubts.....some time... You'll know.

Rubai: Omer Khayyam

For "IS" and "IS - NOT"
though with Rule and Line,
And "UP - AND - DOWN" without,
I could define,
I yet in all I only cared to know,
Was never deep in anything but...Wine.

_(rendered in English verse by Edward Fitzgerald)

P.S.: while going through some old stuff, i found this. i dont wanna know why but i feel its true.

offlines

*silent*

i dont wanna know... so im drunk. so the time flies.
my sensors are sore, my processor; exhausted. no more food for thought. silence! (excuse me please! *...out of order*.)